Tag Archives: summer

Lonesome Jake and Pretty Kitty

Part of the reason I was so excited to go to AJ6BP was to see my grandparents, Mama Kitty and Big Jake.

You may remember Mama Kitty from the infamous Christmas card series I posted this past December.

If you haven’t seen those Christmas cards, please take a moment and look at them now. Then join me in asking this important question: is it even legal for a woman of her age to look that good in lingerie?

She rocks those high heeled white boots in a way that I could simply never do. Because though her genes have been passed along to 3 daughters and 7 female grandchildren, there is simply no one like her.

To keep her connected to the increasingly digital family news, my Mom helps her navigate the internet. Here she is checking out my cousin Charles and his wife Rachel’s first baby:

(and there’s aunt Jacquie’s notorious living room furniture in the background of the shot)

Her daughters have inherited her elegance, her taste in clothing, her bright smile and good looks, and her knack for pulling off wild jewelry and a great hat.

Case in point: aunt Jacquie’s amazing earrings. I think those are parrots, to the tune of 2 per ear.

Sadly, though I love big earrings from time to time, somehow I ended up with a large head that just looks bizarre in most hats. Why, Darwin? You’d think that the more hat-worthy heads would, by natural selection, triumph in this fashion-obsessed world.

But moving on to Big Jake!

Big Jake? But my name is Gandalf.

I fight the evil dominion of Sauron on a daily basis.

I also enjoy a good mixed drink!

You want some?

If you think Big Jake’s (I mean Gandalf’s) hair and beard are slightly out of control, you ain’t seen nothin,’ my friend. See, at one point many years ago, he vowed never to trim his hair again and thus take his unruly mane to the grave. A few years into this promise, he was looking either like a bohemian French artiste . . . or a homeless man.

(Note: this didn’t last until the grave, because a certain doctor made the decision to tame his unmanageable locks during a certain surgery.)

In fact, one of my clearest memories of my sister Heidi’s wedding a year and a half ago involves a very straggly-haired Big Jake. I was one of the bridesmaids, and we were all dressed and ready for the ceremony. The wedding was starting in 20-30 minutes, and we girls were taking some final pictures of Heidi in the hall outside the sanctuary while the guys helped Mike prepare his soul. Or whatever it is guys do right before a wedding. I heard footsteps; I turned around. “Oh my gosh!” I thought, with a sharp intake of breath. “There’s a homeless man coming towards us! We’re just a bunch of defenseless girls wielding bouquets! I need to alert someone!”

And then I did a double take and realized it was my own grandfather, who moments later was pressing a couple hundred dollar bills into my hand. See, he’d heard I had an interest in photography and was determined to help fund the purchase of a camera.

A few months later, I bought my Nikon on craigslist. A few months after that, I started this blog. And more than a year after that, here we are, with posts fueled by pictures regularly taken with that very camera. So I guess you could call him one of the patrons saints of this blog. Or, I mean, patron wizards.

Now that I think about it, most of my memories of Big Jake involve him pressing either money or alcohol into my hands. And railing on me for not wearing high heels, to the cries of “If you got it, flaunt it!”

I love you guys, Mama Kitty and Big Jake! There is no one like you, and never will be.

The garden of Dr. Evil

Aunt Jacquie’s house is wonderful, unique, thoughtfully decorated. We’ve already talked about her elegant but unloungeworthy living room, and we will be doing a tour of the secret staircase and castle wonderland that is the attic, but today I wanted to revel with y’all in her garden.

Here’s the front of the house with its lush green grass and hosts of plants.

The front of the yard has this marvellous old tree . . .

. . . where aunt Jacquie has thoughtfully installed a little door for the gnomes to go in and out. This will go a long way in improving the crumbling state of human/gnome relations, I’m sure.

But that’s just the beginning of the garden dynasty she is building–let’s go around to the back of the house:

The patio area is brand new, and was the perfect setting for a grilling post, manned by Martin for approximately 12 hours straight.

I dub thee Martin of the Grilled Bacon.

The patio area is also perfect for toenail painting (and the refurbishing of waning pedicures):

And adult conversation under the shade of the umbrella.

Do you remember that time (in your early days on this planet) when adult conversation was a mystery? Why would anyone just want to sit around and talk all day? I would ask myself. Surely there were more interesting things to do–like making paperdolls. Or going swimming. Or jumping over towels. Or pretending that the grass is a pit of quicksand, and you have walk along its edge in perfect balance and not set a single toe on it–or else you’ll fall in and be swallowed whole.

As you can see, the patio is not the end of the back yard.

There is an expanse of open space in which any children at hand can completely exhaust themselves running around.

Go Snugs go!

The adults can also migrate to the shade under the tree and continue their boring conversational endeavors.

While the kids were blowing bubbles, my cousin Eleanor and her friend Summer chatted away on some blankets.

I don’t have any landscaping skills or any reason to do landscaping, being ferreted away in an apartment building far away from things called ‘yards’ or ‘lawns,’ but if I did have some such yard or lawn, I would certainly find inspiration in what aunt Jacquie has done with the place.

Hmmm–that was a convoluted way of saying ‘way to go aunt Jacquie!’

She has some mad skillz.

Yes, I just said ‘skillz’–and I’m not taking it back. Nope.

Let’s venture around to the side of the house, where there is another patio area nestled in.

June and aunt Jacquie did me the courtesy of posing. I think I’ll call this area the ‘breakfast nook.’ Or maybe the ‘afternoon tea nook.’ Or maybe the ‘movie star nook.’

Yes, June is looking like a movie star.

Something about those sun glasses screams ‘glamour!’ to me.

And the flowers . . . oh the flowers. Is there anything more photogenic in the world?

I mean, besides movie star June?

So I’m curious–who out there has yards? And how much design have you put into them? And do you mow your lawn with great joy or with great gloom? Or do you just hire the neighbor boy to do it?