Since I have never stated my husband’s real name on this blog, I thought that today I would at least share his plethora of nicknames with y’all. They have morphed and multiplied over our 10 years together, and there are more than I could count. This is possibly due to the fact that when I’m feeling particulary affectionate, I speak in gibberish. In fact, just the other night I exclaimed in a transport of cuddliness “I’m going to schmandy* your bott**!!!”

*Schmandy = not even I claim to know what this means–but I like to keep the possibilities open

**Bott = body + butt

Anyway, on to the nicknames. Here’s what we got!

-Babes / Baby / Babycakes / Babzerillo

-Sweet thang / sweeterino / the sweet the sweet

-Lovebug

-Kiddo / Kidderino

-Honey bunches / Honey bunches of oats

-Sweetie pie / Sweetie-Bar-Pie

-Lovecakes

-Cutie patootie

-Little Guy — a term of endearment in no way connected to his height, taken from this Strongbad cartoon

-Crandyhamme / Crandyhammey / Crandy / Crandyapple

Here’s the story: we were moving from Delaware to Chicago and packing up boxes. All boxes were labeled according to their contents: BDR for bedroon, LVR for living room, BTHR for bathroom, etc. However, the particular box I was working on contained so much random stuff that I decided to label it ‘random.’ Based on my brand of silliness, ‘random’ became ‘crandom’ which then became ‘crandyhamme.’ I emblazoned this on the side of the box. At some indeterminate point and for some strange reason that even I can’t explain, I started calling my husband ‘crandyhamme’ after the box. ‘Crandyapple’ and ‘crandyhammey’ are then just obvious permutations. Don’t you agree?

-Shmanty / Schmantypants (also a nickname for my sisters)

-Spanky / spankypants (ditto on the above)

-Man hands

-Hot Stuff — ’cause it’s true. Especially when he’s doing dishes.

Or making cookies.

Or shaving. Or doing push-ups. Or even just sitting on the couch. Actually, now that I really think about it, he’s pretty dang hot at all times. See, normally . . . I don’t think. I just attack.

-Handsome / cransom

-Bestbottom / Bumgenius — These are the most recent additions to the list, debuting about about a month ago when my sister was talking about cloth diaper brands. In my defense, Crandyhamme started it by calling me ‘bumgenius’ one evening. I quickly responded in kind. And you know how they say ‘much truth is said in jest’? Well, these nicknames really reflect how I feel about him. I mean, can I help it if I think his bottom is actually the Best Bottom? Or that his Bum is a Thing of Genius??

Stay tuned Monday for some pictures of the Man of Many Names from our deep past that you will not want to miss. *snort snort*

Have a great weekend everyone!