22 Weeks

How far along: 22 Weeks, completed 6.5.2012

Weight gain: The usual response–we’ll see at my next appointment. Merci pour votre patience.

Clothes: Ever since marking my stomach with deep divets in an attempt to wear my skinny black corduroys, I’ve stayed away from regular pants and indulged in skirts, maternity jeans, and dresses with leggings. I might try to give my skinny jeans one last hurrah . . . but those divets, man. They were deep.

Purchases: Nothing new–just working on my baby registry on target.com. And speaking of the registry, I had no idea how much thought and time this was going to require. I’ve spent hours . . . and hours . . . and hours . . . scratching my head over high chairs, debating over diapers, befuddled about bassinets . . . and I’m feeling mightily uncertain about some of my selections. Especially in terms of strollers. The world of strollers is confusing, intimidating, and I’m convinced that no matter how much research I do, I’ll probably choose exactly the wrong thing. If any of you have in-depth registry experience and want to see what I have going on and offer your invaluable advice on what I’m forgetting or what I shouldn’t even have in there in the first place, it would be much appreciated (and that really isn’t a plug for every person possible to buy me a gift . . . or is it??).

Body: Changes are afoot. I mentioned last week that my abs suddenly started not responding in their usual, helpful way. That continues. Whoever thought that rolling over in bed would be a challenge? Or going from prone to upright on the couch in order to answer the phone? It’s redeeeeklus, is what it is.

Stairs have also started becoming undesirable. I’m not exactly sure why–I’m only carrying around an extra 6 lbs or so max (the little one being about 1 of those 6 pounds), but it feels like I’m lugging a medium-sized, awkwardly-shaped appliance up each step. We made our first baby-induced decision not to run up the El station stairs to catch a train when we heard it approaching on the tracks. There was just no way. I used to be the girl that sprinted when she heard the rumble on the tracks . . . now I’m the girl who looks dolefully upward at the heights to be climbed . . . and sighs.

Sleep: Can I tell you how much I love my body pillow? Each night has become a blissful haven now that I’ve relinquished my independence from this long, fluffy sleeping crutch.

Best moment(s) of the week: Feeling our little girl move around–it always brings me a rush of happiness. And more on that right here:

Movement: Our little girl is on the move! And the feeling is now 100% unmistakeable, in case I haven’t made that clear yet. There’s no chance it’s indigestion or digestion–it’s the flips and kicks of a little person (though I can’t yet tell flip from kick, foot from hand, or any of that level of detail).

While I’m having my coffee in the morning she usually wakes up and gives me a few thumps. There’s no way the caffeine could reach her that quickly, so I wonder if it’s the hot cup on my belly that does the trick. She’ll move about a few times during the day, and then almost always kicks the strongest when I lie on my back at night. It’s wild, and I absolutely love it–I had no idea that feeling the movement would be such a beautiful experience. It’s comforting (because I know she’s alive and well), inspiring (because it reminds me she’s there! I still forget sometimes), and makes me feel so connected to her, loving, protective–the works. If this is any indication, I have a feeling that the emotions of motherhood are going to be more powerful than I could have dreamed.

Food cravings/aversions: Sushi, sushi, sushi. In particular, a big ole spicy salmon roll. With fatty, delicious chunks of buttery salmon (isn’t raw salmon kind of buttery?), encased in spicy sauce, rice and seaweed, with a bright green spot of wasabi to wake up the sinuses with its mustardy blast.

Symptoms: Feeling heavy and awkward when I try to move, I guess. And I know that will only get more intense as the weeks progress.

Though on a side note, want to see a cool trick?

Here’s the belly in relaxation mode, in all its bellyness . . .

Now wait for it . . .

Hee hee.

I was also sick Thursday (throwing up real chunks of food–which is more than I can say I experienced even during the height of morning sickness). It was only my stomach that was off–no fever, headache, throat pains, or anything else–so it seemed to point to food poisoning. Except that I ate the exact same thing that everyone else had, and nobody else went down for the count like I did. So my other theory is that our little girl was having a growth spurt and my body was freaking out. At this point, we’ll never know.

Emotions: A little emotional about my body not working exactly the same way it always has–but I worked through my crankiness and now I feel much more at peace about it.

Other than that, I’ve just been feeling overwhelmed by life this week. Stretched thin, I guess. And the thing is–I’m not really. I just feel that way (and I hate it when my emotions refuse to match up with reality–it just makes me even more emotional). What with plugging ahead with work on our first album (we’re in the vortex of mixing and tweaking, which right now seems like a neverending process), church stuff, social stuff, photography stuff, and all the other stuff of life, looking at my calendar these days just makes me cry. It’s so silly, because I’m excited about all the stuff on the calendar. No single day will be too much. But when I allow myself to look at the whole and try to grasp everything that has to be done in the next two months, the surge of emotion just takes over and all I want to do it sit in a corner and weep.

I need perspective! Could someone bring some over, please?

And while you’re at it, you might as well pick me up a spicy salmon roll.

Hopes and dreams: I’m dreaming about Christmas again, since my parents have now finished building their house. Seeing the pictures of the beautiful finished space on facebook launched me into daydreams of evenings by the fire, morning espressos brewed by Dad, brisk snowy walks along the peaceful streets, long talks with Mom in the sun room, an afternoon of creativity up in the studio . . . aaaaah. My sisters and their spouses both plan on being there as well, so it will be a family reunion like none other, with two brand-spankin’ new babies to pass around (Heidi’s 2nd little boy, due in September, and my little girl), cooing and crying and being snuggled by all.

What I miss: Bounding up the stairs to the train with leaping legs and an unencumbered stomach.

And, at the moment, feeling that I can handle my life, and that I’m the calm and collected Queen of my Calendar instead of a sweaty, tired lackey.

Though I know Jesus certainly wasn’t Queen of his Calendar–he was all about the servanthood thing, following the agenda of his Father, and humbly attending to the needs of others. So it seems like there may be a big spiritual lesson in what feels like a hot mess.

I love it when there’s a spiritual lesson inside the hot mess. It makes the hot mess so much more bearable.

What I’m looking forward to: Every new week seems to bring changes, so I can’t wait to see what I’m feeling and experiencing next week! Especially in terms of movement and our little one’s patterns of waking and sleeping in her watery playground.

Husband update: Not much to report–other than his infinite patience with my overflowing emotions.

Oh yeah, and that he was sicker than I’ve ever seen him over the weekend.

But he’s better now!

On that note, have a great weekend everyone. I will be back next week, hopefully with my flag flying high instead of damply sagging.

14 thoughts on “22 Weeks

  1. giselle

    I didn’t know Heidi was pregnant too! How exciting 🙂 Congrats to Heidi!

    And man, look at your torso! It’s like a million miles long.. lucky! 🙂

  2. TheKitchenWitch

    Get a MacClaren (or is it McClaren?) stroller for later, when baby can sit up without having to latch the car seat into the stroller. Worth every penny. That thing is so easy to push/maneuver and easy to collapse into almost nothing when you aren’t using it. Also worth the investment is an early stroller that is carseat compatible so you just remove the carseat from the base and click it into the stroller. Keeps a sleeping baby sleeping, and that is good for mommy. I never realized until I had my first baby how important strollers are! I’d also ask for both a baby swing and a vibrating little portable recliner; if the little Miss has tummy issues, as mine did, the movement really helps her get relief.

    But what I really want to know is: what are your nursery plans? Color, theme? I will never forget my 1st wedding anniversary with my husband–we spent it painting the nursery. 🙂

    1. Jenna Post author

      Awesome!! Thanks for the advice, Kitch.
      As far as nursery plans–I haven’t even thought about it! We’re moving to a different apartment mid-August, so once we get settled in there I’ll have a little over a month to pull everything together.

  3. Becky

    I remember feeling like my pregnant and immediately post-pregnant body was such a mess and moaning internally that I’d never be the same again, but I sure feel absolutely fine and minus the lovely stretch marks (which make me look like I got mauled by a tiger) I might even be in better shape physically now than ever before. Your body wants you to take it easy right now, and it is letting you know. 😉 Doing great, Jenna! You are so small still! I especially liked the first pic this time around. Cute maternity pants!

  4. Shelly

    I have a Jeep stroller, although not exactly like the one you are registered for, and I love it! It’s super lightweight and easy to fold with one hand! Great choice 🙂

  5. Suzie

    That’s funny how your belly disappears, you are still so tiny! This baby stuff is mind-boggling, I can’t believe all the changes since I had my son. Good changes mind you 🙂 Your Christmas plans sound wonderful!

  6. Veronica

    Looking good, girlfriend! Enjoy these days of being able to flatten your belly at will, it probably won’t last much longer! But it’s so cool how little weight you’ve gained, I keep expecting something huge to happen soon, I just can’t see how that little belly will grow into a big one. Ah, Christmas will be a blast with your whole family in the new house with the two new babies. Can’t wait to meet both of them . 🙂

  7. Megan

    lookin’ good. congrats on having an official baby belly now!

    I’m looking forward to checking out your registry and giving you my thoughts on things. But really all babies are different and different families have different needs. I felt like with both the wedding registry and then the baby registry, there were so many things that later I thought, “why in the world did we put that on there and not that other thing?!?” But since you’re stepping into the unknown, other people’s advice can only take you so far and that situation is really unavoidable.

    The whole full calendar thing is really hard, and for some reason gets harder, at least for me. I suggest that you do something I did not do and wish I had: plan at least a weekend trip, but longer if you can, to spend with your hubby and do nothing. As much of nothing as you can. Life is gonna get really crazy, and a good dose of nothingness would be really therapeutic.

  8. Kimby

    Jenna, buttery, salmon-y sushi sounds fabulous! You look wonderful and I laughed over your “disappearing baby belly trick.” (By the way, can you teach that to a post-menopausal woman with ensuing midriff bulge…?) 🙂

    Your hubby is as handsome and patient as ever (I read between the lines) and you have a good handle on your emotions vs. reality. (Which is more than I can say about my two pregnancies…) (!!!) Recently, I read that we always have one spirit, but we inhabit several bodies during our lifetimes… that made sense to me. I hope it makes sense to you. Enjoy your baby body!! xo

  9. Sarah K.

    Ah! I feel like I identified so much with this that I could’ve written this post. The days of bounding up the stairs to the train are definitely over. Sprinting to the bus is done for me too. Feeling heavy and awkward and not having the belly size that would seem to correspond to those feelings? Check and double check. Well, I guess now I have the belly, but that feeling started WAY before the belly was big enough to justify it, at least in my mind.

    I got sick from food too and no one else did. My doctor said your system gets really picky and if it so much as catches as hint of something that it thinks might be dangerous, your body is liable to kick it out. I’ve heard the opposite might also happen though where everyone else gets sick and you don’t because your body goes into hyperdrive to take care of the nastiness.

    If you want to come over and check out our stroller, you’re more than welcome to. You can even come in August when we’ll have a baby to test it out. 🙂 I felt like it was helpful to go to Babies R Us where you can test different models, fold them up, etc. and get a feel for what might suit your style. One of the big factors for us what that our stroller didn’t scare Steven. That’s exactly what he said, “This one is the least scary looking.” lol. At the end of the day, it does seem like every family and every baby is different. That’s scary to me as someone who wants to plan and pick the perfect stuff ahead of time. Who knows though? Maybe the baby wrap that I registered for will be something my son hates but your daughter loves so we’ll all end up just sharing stuff.

    Also, I completely identify with feeling schedule shock. There’s so much to do and all of it’s good, but how do I have time to prepare for these life changes and make sure things are ready but still balance that with my normal everyday life? I don’t know. I don’t have an answer, but I’m choosing to take deep breaths when I start to freak out and tell God that I choose to trust Him.

    And about the emotions…Steven was laughing at me yesterday because I just couldn’t help myself. In the middle of writing an email at work, I was totally blown away by a whole flood of emotions that prompted me to text Steven “I just LOVE our baby so much!!” My little heart just can’t contain it. I had no idea the depth of the feelings. It’s amazing and scary at the same time. I’m afraid of completely losing perspective. One of my big fears is worshipping the gift instead of the Giver.

    Anyway, sorry for the long comment. Like I said, I just really resonated with a lot of this post. Well, at 32 weeks pregnant maybe not the magic disappearing belly act. Ha! Lots of love to you and Baby Wa-Wa.

    1. Jenna Post author

      Sarah, I loved, loved, loved reading your awesome long comment! I really want to be faithful in going to God immediately every time I go into schedule shock instead of trying to work through my emotions alone (I just make a bigger mess). Looking forward to seeing you Friday at the Barretts’!

  10. Julie M.

    I think you and I were in the same sick zone. I was losing my cookies all day on Wednesday and it was an absolute awful experience. Thankfully it only stuck around for that one day. You are looking positively radiant! Have you registered for a baby carrier? I use an Ergo and, honestly, can’t live without it. Especially as you live in the city. They’re great for museums, shops, etc. that just aren’t stroller friendly.

  11. joanne

    I have a feeling that knowing I couldn’t eat sushi would make me crave it all-day-every-day! Same for coffee but I don’t intend to give that up!


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